I LIKE this guy…but am too afraid to say it out loud…bukan sebab malu or segan..okay FINE..I admit..I was a bit malu la…of cuz la…there are too many ‘what if’ in my head now…
WHAT IF HE DOES NOT FEEL THE SAME WAY AS I DO?
WHAT IF HE THOUGHT ME AS A FRIEND?
WHAT IF & WHAT IF & WHAT IF……..
Okaylah…I story 1st laaa….I know him thru friend…whereby time tuh, I was actually lepaking with his friends at mamak. We didn’t know each other mase tuh…but one of my friend sort of kenal kan kami…It was on March when I was actually quite down since En Cokelat walk away from me…so sadis…LOL~
Nak jadi kan cerita, he did ask my number from one of his friend and he did sms me on that particular day we met…time tuh..am not so keen pun to know him…sbb I was not over En Cokelat kan…so…I was a bit jual2 mahal and sort of mls nk kwn2 wif any guy…
After about a month, I was kinda bored..tiba2 tgn ni mcm rajin la pulak nak texting him..so I did texted him and all of sudden we became close…like almost every day he texted me, sumtime he called and we did going out like dating kot..sbb we never did went out with his friends or mine..so I can consider it as dating right??LOL~
Next year on March..it’s going to be a year dah..since I know him…therefore, I really2 need to clarify with him la…what are we actually??who am I to you??I don’t like to be kept in the dark..if u know what I mean…..
But, the problem is…how to berterus terang with him? What am I suppose to say?I am afraid okay..afraid of his rejection to be precise….afraid that we might not be as close as we are now….
Once before, I had an experience of pouring my heart out to a guy…lucky me..he respond it well…and he was okay with it..and we end up to be an item…Tp sekarang…I do think I don’t have the gut to do it again…..haiyoo….how??
I saw him yesterday…he was..well..the usual him…we had sushi..then jalan2 tgk handbag since I need a new bag (typical me)..there are times..when I was about to confess…but I am holding it back…sbb I was too afraid!!Damn it….I hate this situation….
Well it so happened yesterday..we did had a bit of argument…nothing serious..but I was a bit kecil hati with him…on some issues..but instead of being mad at him..I turn to be a bit quiet and kinda moody… He knows me well to know that I am not in a good mood..so he tried his best to cheer me up last nite… by making me laugh…and make me smile all nite…Yes…you make me happy last nite…but, what about future??Can I still have those laughs that I had last nite??
What am I suppose to do now??SUMPAH AKU BINGUNG!!
2 comments:
aiya tunggu apa lagi, confess jer la
u r a guy doink..sng la u...ssh ok..takut tau..huhu~
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