Not that I always pretend to be ikhlas. When I did something that I love or I like at least, perasaan ikhlas itu akan datang secara naturally. For example, I love my work so when I do it..I do it with all my heart. When you do things with all your heart, the outcomes akan jadi lebih amazing..tak percaya??It's okay...different people have different views so I respect that.
My problem is, when I don't like to do something or I don't like someone, I can't pretend to be ikhlas or to pretend to like that person. Seriously, I can't....
Sometimes, I do think that I am being rude. If I don't like that particular someone or I don't like a situation, it will definitely shows on my face. What I did is, my mouth will keep on ramblings and the look of my face shows it all. I know it is rude but I can't help it...I can't fake it...Hurrmm..I tried once but it didn't work. End up, I akan jadi lebih stress and I tend to get angry with those around me. I don't like when I'm angry because then I am going to say something that I might regret later on. Ya, my mouth can be super sarcastic and evil once I'm angry . So yes....don't try me...hee~
I guess, being the eldest of 4 make me a bit keras hati whereby I tend to not listen to other people instructions. LOL~ What I meant is, am not really keen to follow other people orders unless it was given by god (because it is compulsory). Even when it come to my parent, sometimes I do object few of their demands and orders...hee~Yupss...like I said, my mind don't really know how to take orders especially when it comes to things that I don't like. Sorry....
Despite that, when it comes to work...it is different...I mean, work is work..what ever your boss orders you to do, you have to comply unless if your boss ask you to do sesuatu yg salah then you have the right to say NO.
Hurrmm...
How to actually overcome this issue eh??Deep down. I know...I can't continue be this kind a person. A person who can't simply be sincere when she was asked to do things she don't like. I can see that several people like one of my cousin for example, she can simply be sincere when someone asked her to do things which she is not keen to do so...not like me. I tend to rebel against those who asked me to do things that I don't like particularly my family. LOL~
If we were to talk about sincerity, it is not easy nowadays. People all around you definitely have their own agenda to fulfill. Then, how are we going to know that someone is actually sincere?? My answer is, No..you won't even have a clue kot..hee~ My suggestion is, trust yourself, use your head and think before you trust. Saya pun mudah believe in other people sincerity, I mean..come on laa...you can't never know unless it is proven. It's okay...life is a gamble it self...learn from mistakes.
Obviously, I don't have any conclusion to my so called issue. I don't even have a clue pun on what am I suppose to do to overcome this issue....runsing + serba salah + I feel bad.
Okay lahh....for now I should sleep and look back upon my rudeness due to not being sincere...sobss~
- si budak tidak ikhlas tadi-
2 comments:
bace dgn gigih ..sya fhm ape tihah luahkan ni..sume urg laluinya...
apepun biarkan faktor luaran mempengaruhi dalaman (hati) kite..*sya petik kata2 idola sya prof. dr.muhaya..
psst,sya senyum byk tgk last picture teu lucu ni si awek ozil...alahai tak ikhlas iye..xmo lah mcm tue...okeh!!!
hurmmm..xtahu la...sy ssh hati ok memikirkan yg sy tend to be rude dgn org juz because sy tidak ikhlas n the worst is, sy akn tunjuk yg sy tak ihklas...jahat kan?? *sedih*
Post a Comment